Suffering Such Pain

August 12, 2009

Yesterday, I suffered such pain again. In school, I stayed in the clinic the whole afternoon because of headache, a very painful one. I almost fainted because of the pain. It’s like my head is going to break and I can’t understand the pain. It started in my head, then goes down to my nose, moved into my eyes and then my body started to chill uncontrollably. My legs started to weaken and I could barely breathe.

I felt scared so I texted my mom and told her that what happened and that I was in the clinic cause my head really hurts. I waited for her reply, but it wasn’t a text message, it was a phone call. And she said that she was coming. She sounded so worried on the phone. I waited for her in the clinic, and I could only close my eyes to ease the pain. Then I heard a voice calling my name, it sounded like mom. I got up and put on my shoes and just got into the car.

When we were in the car, I laid my head on her shoulders, then she placed her hand on my head and I felt secured.

When we arrived in the house, I laid in bed and mom was in my side until I fell asleep.

The pain I suffered yesterday is not the last and the worst. There is still more to come, more painful, and a lot more sufferings. I don’t know what’s next. But I’m praying that He will help me be ready and to ease the pain, and not let me suffer longer anymore.

I always remember what my Dad always say, “Fight! Fight! Fight!”. When I hear those words, I wanted to follow it, but its still the same.

Some people are saying “Never lose hope”. But I don’t want to hope, because I don’t want to be hurt. Cause everyday, when I’m feeling such pain, my hopes are getting lesser and lesser.

My family is praying everyday for my recovery. But I felt worse and worse everyday. I heard my dad on the phone saying that, almost all the people were praying for former president Cory Aquino, but still God took her.

So I’ll let God decide what is good for me. Because He knows what’s best.

The pain I’m suffering right now is only temporary. Someday these pains will be gone, and I’ll be happy again.

-Samantha Nicole Delfin

*Uncle's Note

i told my sister to ask the doctor if there is still a chance for sam to recover, even a slim one.. during her almost a week stay in the hospital, sam was subjected to series of tests to check if she has a chance or surviving the operation... and the result was good, she has a chance in surviving the operation.. the bad news though is that the operation will cost a hefty amount.. and i do not want this blog to sound like a money-making scam by requesting for donations and the likes...this blog is for sam to express what she is feeling and that for her attention to be diverted away from the pain that she is feeling..

but for every reader who would like to help, post a note and we will contact you and provide you with the information that you need...your help may not necessarily be in cash but it can be in information or endorsement to foundations or companies that are willing to help...